the support network

One of my biggest concerns that I have while preparing for my surgery is the care of my brother while I am incapacitated.  The nursing home is not good about changing his hearing aid battery and shaving him. Also, I wonder how even if I can drive if I am going to be able to lift his walker into the car so I can take him out of the nursing home at least once a week, which I have been doing since he got there.

So I called the nursing home administrator, who is new.  I just got a collection agency bill from the doctor's billing service, which doesn't accept medicaid.  I have a very difficult time understanding how a nursing home can use a doctor that doesn't accept medicaid when there are people on medicaid who live there.  The original administrator told me to ignore the bills, that she would call the doctors office and take care of it.  She obviously never did.  The new ones told me that she knows this is a problem and is about to call the doctor and tell him to start accepting medicaid or they will find a new doctor.  She said for right now, most families pay the bills.  They are not much right now because my brother also has insurance, but there is going to be a six month period where he doesn't have insurance and also doesn't have medicare.  (what a great health care system we have!). I just paid the bill last night.

Then I told her about my upcoming surgery, about the lost clothes, shaving, the need for the CNTs to make sure that they walk my brother and do chair exercises, etc.  I told her that when I get bills (the bills take into account that my brother gets SSI, all that money minus $30 goes to the nursing home) it would be great if they would say what month they are for so I can keep them for the trust records,  We'll see if she delivers.

Last night, I asked my husband if he would be willing to visit my brother while I was incapacitated.  He agreed, and also assured me that if the cancer turns out to be serious, he will assume responsibility for him.  I hate to stick him with this, it never occurred to me that I might not outlive my brother.

All this is pretty morose, I am hoping, and it is likely, that all I need is a hysterectomy and that's it, and that I willl be back on my feet in a month.  Nevertheless, these thoughts have crossed my mind, especially in the middle of the night.  I wouldn't wish this on anyone.