bela fleck

My brother's 67th birthday is next Sunday.  This Sunday, my husband and I took my brother out for dinner and music as something different.

He seemed kind of tired when we picked him up.  We went to Noodles and Company (because it's located in a shopping center near a parking lot) and he ordered Pad Thai.  He didn't eat all of it.

Next we went to go hear Bela Fleck, who is a famous banjo player, as well as his wife, Abigail Washburn, who is also a famous banjo player.  The music last night was all about American Roots.  It was lovely.

The auditorium  where the concert was located was lovely.  A big parking lot and access was easy.
Every seat in the house was good.

It was some work to get him from the car to his seat, but after he was seated, the logistics were ok.

Even his hearing aid was working, which was a miracle.

Yet, it was really hard to tell what he thought about the music.  Could he hear it, or did it sound like noise because of his hearing loss?  What kind of sense can he make of music?  I know some, because I hear him humming some times.

When I asked him if he liked the concert he told me that he didn't grow up on folk music.  Obviously, neither did I.  But it is unclear what kind of music he likes, it's not like he ever asked for a radio channel, a record, or anything like that so you would know.  Eventually he said he enjoyed it.  My husband thinks he probably liked the evening because it got him out of the nursing home and with a crowd and human contact.

I had mixed feelings about the event.  Obviously, it's important to get him outside and not to just do routine visits to the House of Pancakes and Panera, which we have done a lot.  But I also felt like we could have taken him anywhere, any place would do.  I thought about how much the communication with him is mainly one way.  I found myself wondering what he was thinking very often, it's clear his mind and thinking processes are not like mine.

I also felt myself feeling a little (not a lot) resentful, about all the sheparding needed.  It's true the evening was for him, and not for me, and it served its purpose.  Yet it also reminded me that I usually need to prod myself to take him out because it's just not that fun, even if the music was great.

Next week we do our routine birthday dinner at a restaurant. Two of our friends are very considerate and agree to join us.  For that I am very grateful, it makes it less depressing.  My guess is that brother will enjoy that experience more.